Did the Holy Spirit Leave Me? Am I Going to Hell?

Question from a Site Viewer

I’m afraid that the Holy Spirit has left me.

I have been having blasphemous thoughts like the unforgivable sin and rejecting Jesus. Can these thoughts create false emotions or second guessing? I’m going through spiritual warfare. There will be a moment of strong belief and then rejection. I want belief because there is so much proof. Will God soften my heart? Will Jesus guide me back? I pray about it every day. Did the Holy Spirit leave me? Am I going to hell? I’m only 14. And just curious can a person literally sell his/her soul? Pray for me. I want strong belief in Jesus.

Tim’s Answer

Thank you for your question. Emotions can be a roller coaster in life. Fortunately, in most situations, we are not helpless. Peter tells us to gird up the loins of our mind (1 Peter 1:13). The idea is to exercise self control to prepare our minds for the tasks given to us. We understand that we will have feelings and thoughts that will come into our minds that are not pleasing to God and not helpful for us. We live with minds that can bring forth all sorts of temptations to us. To live effective lives, we must take our thoughts into captivity. We must manage our thoughts. When bad thoughts intrude, we want to make conscious choices not to dwell on such thoughts. We should not give them place in our lives. Rather, we should consciously choose to shift our minds to think about what is good (Philippians 4:8). We should focus our minds on loving God and loving others. We should choose to pray, to sing, to quote Scripture, or any number of other good things. We should choose to draw near to God.

It sometimes is easy to draw near to God when our thoughts cooperate with us. It is much more difficult to do so when the thoughts invading our minds are evil. But, it is especially in those times of temptation that we need to learn the discipline of going to God, telling Him exactly what is happening without repeating the evil thoughts (we do not want to reinforce in our minds those thoughts), and seeking His grace to help us think about pure thoughts. At times, this can be a real battle. But understand there is one who is in the battle with you. And if you have the perseverance, you will win the battle. The bad thoughts will recede and the mind will be transformed into the beauty of Christ.

The big danger is that we may give up, and stop taking an active part in drawing our minds into God. I will give you a couple of very practical suggestions to help you in the days, months, and years ahead of you. Take time to memorize Scripture and then meditate on it. Seek for Christ in Scripture, because the Scriptures testify of Him. Find out what He is like. Also, take time to praise and thank Him. A mind that habitually praises God is one that will have a more difficult time thinking about sin. And sing songs pleasing to our Lord. Whether you like hymns, or modern songs, make it a point to put into your mind songs that lead your mind to think about the best things of life, including God.

Finally, do not be shaken when bad thoughts attempt to enter the mind. Rather, be prepared for them. The moment they show up, shut them out. Do not give them place. Engage in the effort to avoid thinking about those thoughts and actively choose to pray, praise, or sing.

You will find as you seek God in these ways, persevering sometimes through dark times, He will in the end show Himself strong on your behalf.

You ask whether the Holy Spirit has left you. Jesus says in Hebrews 13:8 that He will never leave us. And if Jesus stays with us, His Spirit will stay with us as well. But we must believe these truths by faith because there will be times we will not feel them to be true. Clinging to the promises of Scripture even when feelings are contrary is a critical stabilizing factor in life.

You ask whether a person can sell his soul. I am not sure of the idea you may be asking about. There is no sense in Scripture that a person can enter into a contract to sell their soul to the devil, if that is what you mean. Certainly, one can follow the devil and reap the brief elation and lasting misery that the devil brings. But as long as there is life, there is the opportunity for that person to repent of their evil ways and turn to Christ. The heart of the Savior is that the sinner repent.

There is a sense that a person can sell their soul by spending their life pursuing the things of this world rather than the things of God. Jesus speaks about this in asking what profit there was if we gained the world and lost our own souls (Matthew 16:26). But I do not believe that is what you are asking, as I sense that you have made a decision to follow after Christ with your life and that you are pursuing that goal. I encourage you to pursue Him always. He never forsakes those who seek Him.

May the Lord Jesus and His Spirit guide you as you mature in love for Him and for others.


In His service,
am I going to hell