I’m Afraid God Will Not Forgive Me – I’ve Gone Too Far

Question from a Site Viewer

I don’t even know if I was ever saved. And now I feel like I’m beyond hope. I just feel like I sinned in an unpardonable, unforgivable way. I think I crossed the line and there is no hope for me. I want to be forgiven. I want to be cleansed. I struggle with terrible thoughts. I wish I wasn’t so horrid. I believe if I told you my sin, you would say I’m guilty of the unpardonable sin. I really think that.

Tim’s Answer

I believe that it is when we realize that we ourselves are no better than others, that our sin is as offensive to God as any other sin in the world, that then we begin to understand our desperate need for Him and His great grace in coming to us. He does not come to us because we are good, but because we need deliverance. Eternal life is solely because of His grace. When we stop looking at our own righteousness, or lack thereof, and turn solely to Him, we will find our salvation in Him. I know you have stated that you had come to Him for salvation earlier in life, but I think we should always continually come to Him. This is what Christ teaches in John 6:35. I tell people to come early and often. Come and seek rest in Him.

As for the corruption in your thoughts, the thinking patterns in the brain are not instantly changed by coming to Christ. This is why God commands us, as followers of Him, to change those patterns. If the change was automatic, there would be need for God to command us to take control of our thoughts. But God commands us to renew our minds (Romans 12:2). He commands us to set our minds on things above (Colossians 3:2). He commands us to think about good things (Philippians 4:8). He commands us to put off sin and put on righteousness (Romans 6:11-19). These are commands that come to us as children of God. He expects us to obey these commands and He has sent His Spirit to empower us to do them. Paraphrasing G. K. Chesterton, the Christian life has not been tried and found wanting, but it has been found difficult and left untried. It takes discipline and self control to live the Christian life and reform our minds.

But let me encourage you with this. Our work is to draw close to God. When we do this, He will provide all of the strength and power we need to reform our minds.

As I have told many people, we draw close to God by memorizing and meditating on His word, by prayer and praise in our everyday lives, and by serving others as He has taught us. It is rather simple, though requiring vigilance. Pleading with God for others helps transform our lives into lives of love focused on being His hands and feet in a world that needs His touch.

I know at the beginning it will feel awkward. You will feel like a hypocrite in praising God when your mind is telling you that God does not love you. But we praise first from the will, and then from the heart. Where our will leads us, our hearts will follow. The same is true of our prayers and actions. We first submit our wills to Him and do what He commands. As we do this, over time we will find that as we seek Him, our hearts will be drawn to Him and we will find ourselves ever more emotionally grateful for His love, forgiveness, grace, and kindness to us.

May your journey towards God become ever more exciting and rewarding.

A servant,

knowing vs doing

11 thoughts on “I’m Afraid God Will Not Forgive Me – I’ve Gone Too Far”

  1. Awesome! Thank u for this caring and thoughtful article Tim.
    In Jesus’ name!
    The most simple formula on how to be saved…the initial conversion experience:
    John 3:3-5; Matthew 16:18,19; Acts 2:38; Galatians 1:8,9
    May Jesus help us as believers to begin to get on the SAME page beginning with “how” one is born again…it is a very real experience and one will KNOW when it happens to them!

  2. Thank you. Jesus saved me and I cling to the truth that “everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved” and “everyone who believes has eternal life” and long to live fully for Him, YET have this same fear… knowing there are “branches…without fruit… cast into the fire,” knowing I have after salvation sinned against a holy God and not currently “feeling” the Holy Spirit’s indwelling, concerned that I have grieved the Spirit to the point of justly being rejected.

    1. Hi, CRL. As long as you’ve confessed and repented of whatever your sin was, He will forgive and restore you even if you don’t feel it happening. I suggest that you thank Him for His forgiveness and for the presence of His Spirit within you regardless of your feelings… I myself did this four years ago after a long time of rebellion, and the Lord has blessed me massively ever since! God bless you in all that you do.

  3. Im a Christian but about 15 years ago I hurt my back and the doctor put me on pain medication I see her every month and she checks my medication to make sure that I’m not abusing them but I didn’t know anything about them but I feel that God is so displeased with me and some people have said that I would go to hell on them. What can I do I love Jesus but I feel so guilty I’ve come to a point that I don’t know what to do. Terry

  4. Hello, so here’s my story:

    3 years ago… i repented, i had a warm hug feeling from my soul and my mind was at peace for the first time ever, and its only been like that when i was like that. dating back to now. .. i recently started to find God again, i wanted to pray, and read the bible more. recently i have been i have been struggling with religious ocd , i have depression, anxiety, ptsd, and adhd… im having really scary thoughts about God and the Holy Spirit and Jesus… im afraid my heart is hardening and im gonna hate him.. i have thoughts saying they “want to take over God’s kingdom, there is no savior, you are too far gone, or where they blasphhemize the trinity, i accidently call God dumb or them a liar and then i say something against the holy spirit, and i know i shouldnt but i do it anyway… i even said “i dont wanna read the stupid bible, or where i said i want to be a child of satan, … i even had a thought that was picturing hurting jesus and at the end i laughed…. ” i have had thoughts of suicide i’ll admit … i feel like there’s no hope for someone like me… im questioning if i even received the holy spirit… im not sure this is how a person with God would behave… im scared im too far gone and that because i feel my heart is starting to harden there will be no hope for me.. ive been asking God for the will of Repentance and a barrier to guard my mind against such thoughts and to keep me humble… ive talked to my psychologist, therapist and a spiritual advisor… he said “This will help you Because when you come into the Father’s love you can never be snatched out of his hand” ive just been having really really bad anxiety, i know i shouldnt expect God to turn things around immediately, .. but ive been praying … maybe i am too far gone though, because i ask for the will of repentance and i say im sorry when i pray , but im not sure if its up to God’s standards.. i dont know what to do

    1. Hi Rain,

      I was reading your story and I can relate to having a lot of anxiety and thoughts that I am afraid make me bad and not a true Christian…but then I remember in the book of Ephesians 6:10-20, where it says to put on the Full Armor of God in order to defeat the devil. I think the problem is..even with being saved, we can be so focused on our sins, which is what the devil wants…for us to feel like we’re not forgiven. So, it does help to know that these are real spiritual attacks from Satan because he doesn’t want us saved. But, it’s still hard going through it, I know. And also, in Ephesians 6:12-13
      For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

      Philippians 4:6
      Be anxious for nothing, but by everything by prayer and supplication, with Thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

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