Long hair, pop music and rebellion
I grew up in the sixties, a period of guys with long hair, the Beatles, rebellion, so-called “free love,” hippies and drug experimentation. “Do your own thing” or “if it feels good, do it” were the catch cries of my generation. I had long hair, wore satin shirts and beads and loved “pop” music. Jesus was just a swear word and a fairy tale to me. In my view, anyone who believed in God was weak and unscientific.
Unwanted suicidal thoughts
However, I began to have destructive thoughts. Out of the blue, the thought of “Cut your wrists!” would be planted in my mind. I was amazed and scared by these thoughts because I was satisfied and content with life. In fact, I thought I had everything I needed to be happy.
My friend had gone crazy!
I visited my friend Dave. In the past, he had mocked the Bible as unscientific and argued strongly for the truth of evolution. Now he told me that he trusted in this person called Jesus and also that the scientific evidence didn’t back up the theory of evolution! “Right,” I thought, “Give me a Bible; I’ll prove him wrong!”
The stumbling block of evolution and the miracle of life
I had come close to having a very bad motorcycle accident and this started me thinking about God. But the theory of evolution was a stumbling block for me in believing the Bible because the Bible says that God (not time, chance, mutation and natural selection) is responsible for the universe and for life. I witnessed the miracle of the birth of both of my children. I was stunned by the complexity of the human body and I was starting to see that the theory of evolution was the fairy tale! I began to search for the one who was the Creator of life.
Music—my true addiction
I was invited to view a video on the effect of music and I was stunned as it laid out the nature of my beloved music . . . promotion of rebellion, drugs, depravity, violence, the occult, witchcraft, the devil, sexual perversion, suicide and mockery of Jesus. I wondered why musicians were spending so much time mocking this Jesus character if he was just a fairy tale as I once thought.
I wondered why so many rock musicians died young from suicide and drug overdose, etc. The Who, in their song “My Generation,” sing, “Hope I die before I get old.” But when faced with his friends dying before they got old, Pete Townsend, the guitarist of The Who lamented, “Look at my life. Look at my generation. How did that work? Jimi Hendrix, Brian Jones, Janis Joplin, Keith Moon . . . the list is . . . endless. They’re dead people. My life is full of dead people. My friends are dead.”
How had my music affected me? One thing I knew, I would be a brave person to say that music had not affected me at all!
Jesus said that I should pray so I thought Well, let’s pray! As I said the Lord’s Prayer, the words in the second line (Let your Holy Name be honoured) were replaced by foul and blasphemous words. This occurred on two successive nights and I wasn’t too keen on this evil articulate force that was controlling my thought patterns with suicide and blasphemy!
Placing a challenge before God
One dark night, I was lying in bed thinking. “God, if you are so powerful that you made the universe by speaking, then show me evidence you exist.” I didn’t expect anything to happen because there was no way (or so I thought) that God could show me anything as I lay in bed.
A visitor in the night—God is supernatural!
Suddenly, a man in white clothes appeared in the doorway of the room with his right hand outstretched like a policeman. Out of his hand came a beam of light that moved halfway across the room. I cried out in my mind, “Stop, stop, I believe . . . I believe . . . I’ve seen enough!” This did not stop what I was seeing as the beam of light continued across the room and through the glass into the black of the night where the light destroyed what I conceived as the evil in the world. God had shown me that His light could overcome the darkness.
The grace of God
I surrendered my will to Jesus and trusting in Him has had a powerful effect on my life, totally setting me free from the power behind the thoughts of self-destruction. Immediately (without being conscious of it) I stopped swearing, making comments with sexual connotations and letting my mind wander as I looked at bikini-clad girls.
Things I did not realize as an skeptic
These include: Jesus was a real person, the Bible is the world’s bestselling book, many of the early great scientists and composers had a Christian world view, humans are spiritual beings, many of the great modern scientists believe (as Einstein puts it) that science points us to a “spirit vastly superior to that of men, and one in the face of which we with our modest powers must feel humble,” the scientific evidence against evolution and the Bible is very reliable when judged against the standard historical tests.
God is not far from any of us
My wife lost her engagement ring and we looked in three different places—searching the ground with no success. Lastly we went to the squash court car park. I thought, Now I’m a Christian, I suppose I should pray! I started to pray. “Lord help us find . . . ” In mid-sentence my wife interrupted me saying, “Here’s the ring!”
Jesus is the only way to God. He is the key for you and me. Give Jesus the control of your life. After 20 years as a Christian, I still marvel at the blessings and grace that Jesus continues to shower into my life. Now I wonder why I took so long to come to know Him!