My testimony has been shared and it’s nearly 40 years old but if you want it, you’ve got it. I was raised without religion. The only thing I knew is that there is a creator. My grandma told me that. When I was 18, I was working for a senior citizen, Barney (live-in), while I finished high school.
We went to the grocery store. When we came out, there was a boy giving away the cutest puppies and I had to stop to look. A lady with beautiful and very long hair stopped to look too. She was friendly and nice and we chatted a good bit, with Barney waiting patiently.
Then she turned to me and was getting ready to say goodbye. She hesitated over her words making me wonder how hard or unusual “bye” could be. Finally, in a very authentic way, she said, “Jesus loves you.” I was astounded. It was the last thing I ever expected anyone to say. I didn’t believe I was loved, by anyone, and I didn’t believe I was loveable.
Then suddenly something strange and very unaccountable happened. Everything went dark. The grocery store, cars, humans, puppies, trees, blue sky, sun–every single thing in this world was wiped out of existence and it was just me in a very dark space. Then it was me standing in a cauldron. The cauldron was bubbling and frothing. It seemed angry. I felt like I was standing in demons. Oddly my clothing was not wet.
Then a hand went up. It was easily the size of my torso. It went up in the same position a police officer puts their hand to stop the traffic. The frothing stilled. Then I could hear the words again, replayed from memory. Jesus loves you.
I wondered at it. Who is Jesus? Why does he love me? Then the lady who told me that shrugged her shoulders. I think she was tired of waiting and had no idea of what was going on. Her movements brought me back to the world and the noise, sunlight, and puppies. All things came flooding back into my reality. I looked at her but she was far away. All I could see was her receding back, dwindling away into the distance.
Getting into the vehicle I asked, “What was that?”
“Oh, a Jesus Freak,” Barney said.
He had to explain what that was and then we lapsed into silence. At Barney’s house, I put away the groceries and started dinner while Barney went down to the pub to play pool with his cronies.
I was still a-wonder. Someone loves me! Who loves me? Why? I didn’t believe I was loveable but Jesus was giving me the faith I needed to believe it. It was completely a life changer–so incredibly precious and beautiful.
It wouldn’t leave me alone and I had to know. I thought about it for hours. All afternoon. I decided that, “Who is Jesus?” was the more important question. If I could answer that maybe the other answer would become clear. (On one hand it seems a no brainer–why does Jesus love me? On the other hand it’s an amazement and profound question.)
I thought about it for a long time. Who is Jesus? Finally I thought maybe Jesus is connected to God. They were/are both mysterious, amazing, and incredible to me so it made sense to me that there could be some connection. So I asked myself, “What do I know about God?”
Ah. God has a bible. Does Barney have a Bible? I was off like a shot, all the while thinking if I could find a Bible, and if Jesus was in it, I could read about Jesus and discover who he is (and why he loves me.) However, unbeknownst to me, God had a better plan.
I looked all over the house but if there was a Bible there it was in some secret place. I ended up on the floor in the living room sitting by the lone bookshelf unable to take it in that there was no Bible on that bookshelf. I felt like crying.
“Quick,” I thought. “What else do I know about God? Oh, people pray to God!”
Out loud I said, “God who is Jesus?”
I felt a sensation of knowledge flooding my soul and in the knowledge were the words, “Jesus is the son of God who died on the cross for your sins. He’s resurrected and lives in heaven at the right hand of the Father.”
I didn’t know what “sin,” “cross,” and “resurrection” meant but the understanding came along with the words. I believed, received, and changed my life that day, though I had no idea what had happened to me!
Jesus is no respecter of persons and it doesn’t take an extra special person to have an amazing event. So if you want an amazing event, ask Him for one. Meanwhile . . .
Jesus loves you. Forever and always.
That no one else has the duty, the privilege, and the sacred honor to be you.
The person Jesus loves.
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